With an overflow of different “spiritual” paths and techniques on the “market” today, it can be particularly confusing to both experienced and new minds when deciding on which road to take. If you bring into the equation general recommendation to stick to one school – as constant jumping between is impediment to real progress – one may feel lost and eventually demotivated from cultivating dedicated practice.
We should start by aligning on the ultimate “goal” – which is that of liberation. There are different paths that lead to liberation, however, there are even more paths that lead nowhere. In order to differentiate between those, one needs to cultivate a meticulous habit of keeping the ego in check. Ego will play all tricks up its sleeve in order to avoid its own dissolution – and liberation implies dissolution of the ego.
The direction of any true practice is toward untangling the layers of illusion thus overcoming the false sense of self.
p.s. ego = the false sense of self
Although it is still an over-simplified statement, it does provide a good baseline for doing frequent checks while we progress, in order to make sure we are on track. We want to make sure of the direction we are heading. Is my practice lessening the grips of my conditioning and identification with temporary concepts that the ego mistakenly takes for its own identity, for the big “I”? Or is my practice driven by the ego itself?
These frequent check-ins are necessary because the more we practice, the trickier ego gets. For example, you might start to practice due to some form of dissatisfaction or negativity in your life. As you progress, you may start to feel better about yourself and notice how your life is changing accordingly. Although that is great, it is still not the point, and that is when we should become extra careful, as it provides for a fertile ground for strengthening yet another aspect of the ego – its identification with spirituality.
So-called “spiritual ego” is a chronic condition of 21st century spiritualism. It is a trap that awaits for all of us that are on the path and if we are not aware of the challenge, we will most likely fall into it. How does this happen? Well, instead of stripping the “I” and deidentifying from the concepts, ultimately accepting its impermanence, we do the opposite – we continue to add more concepts to it. Now we are “getting there”, we are “good”, if not even “enlightened”. We “understand how things work”, we have the “solution”, the “remedy”. Our path is the “right one” – and very often, other paths are “lesser” or even “wrong” (hello religious wars and prosecutions!). And what is especially dangerous here, our practice starts to dissolute, eventually loosing its purpose and becoming a mere playground for the games of the ego. Our paths suddenly lead nowhere, but we still believe we are heading there and that we are doing the work.
I have personally wasted several years of my practice doing “work” that was not that, but just the ego entertaining itself. I would sit in what I believed to be meditation and indulge in various “visions”, getting completely lost in the story in my head, just the ones within the “spiritual”, “ethereal” genre. There was also a period in my ashtanga practice when I was focusing solely on asanas, wanting to conquer the next asana and then the next asana (Gotta catch ’em all, Pokemon!) and feeling so good about myself afterwards. It took some turmoil to realize that even yoga will only strengthen what is inside – and if I don’t keep my ego in check, it will just strengthen the ego.
What really made a difference is to change the perspective and focus on meticulous inner observance of concepts and identifications. Observing the voice in my head, realizing it is just that – a voice in my head – and taking space from it. Observing how the ego comes up with different concepts, identifies with them and then adds opposing concepts to the initial concept it created, causing inner distress but basically just entertaining itself. Loosening the great self-importance. Deidentifying with the roles and storylines. Stopping to take myself so serious. Lessening the judgement towards myself and towards the other. Accepting what is. Being present. Strengthening the awareness (Gurdjieff’s “remember thyself”) and tapping into space consciousness.
Any practice that guides you and/or gives you tool to cultivate such perspectives is more likely to point towards liberation then the one that keeps on inflating the ego under different “spiritual” concepts. For example – the traditional Buddhist and yogic meditations in which we aim to strengthen our presence by cultivating focused and prolonged attention on the anchor object of choice (breath / body sensations / mantra / etc.), observing the thoughts as they come and go and not engaging into them – evidently cultivate healthy perspectives helpful towards liberation.
In general, we should strive towards tradition and simplicity in practice, performing frequent sanity checkups. Here is a three-point self-check I tend to do before and while doing any kind of practice:
Is this here, rather then there?
Is this less rather then more?
Is this Being rather then I?
Remember, the ego is tricky but quite predictable. As long as it is some form of “I-ness”, it is still there, creeping in the dark and waiting for the opportunity to strengthen its position. Yes – it is the general condition of humanity and hence necessary for operating in this reality – however, we should still keep it healthy and in check. So when choosing your path and your practice, make sure to often go back to the baseline and be ruthlessly honest to yourself – am “I” really doing the work or am I just kidding myself? It will save you energy, time and money and ultimately bring simplicity and ease into your life. And finally, once you realize how everything is just a grand joke, I promise you will laugh like never before.
Unravel Ninja 